Women in a zoo

I belong an E-group of women seriously involved with a Japanese man. In it appears several interesting topics, one which I would like to share with you all today. One woman had lunch with the wife of her husband's friend. Unfortunately for her, the sole topic of conversation was: "Wow! Isn't it exciting that you're a gaijin!" For those of you unfamiliar with this word, '外人' it simply means foreigner, though translates literally as 'outsider.'

She was SOO excited about having lunch with a foreigner: "Wow! I told all my friends I was having lunch with a gaijin! I have to take your picture on my keitai so they'll believe me!" She fawned compliments about my chopstick use and my Japanese ability (nevermind that I've lived in Japan for 10 years), and when I mentioned that I like fish more than meat, her comment was, "What? Gaijin don't eat fish, do they? I thought gaijin only ate meat." "Oh, I'm so happy that I'm friends with a gaijin! You have to come over all the time and teach my son English!" In her mind, I wasn't ('name'), I was A GAIJIN. I felt like a gaijin monkey in a zoo with a sign in front of me.

Perhaps this member was infuriated by the Japanese woman because she tried so hard to 'fit into' Japan but was still clearly seen as a foreigner, an outsider even after 10 years! I don't mind so much at all - I find it funny how Japanese people are so amused by foreigners who can adapt so well to the Japanese life. At any rate, recently it dawned upon me that, at some point is our life, we have to stop worrying about 'fitting in' and start enjoying ourselves 'as is.'

This does not matter whether you are a native in your own country or expatriot - 'fitting in' is as important as a 500-dollar pair of knickers. So forget about fitting in because if that's what you are going to do all your life, I can guarantee you, you won't be a very happy camper.