how IN TUNE are you?!

Do you ever really notice how someone else is feeling? I like to think I have a good sixth sense, feeling out people's emotional condition...though I must say, mine is nothing compared to the sixth sense of those I have met here - they have got it down to a science! Not to stereotype or anything, but I honestly think most of the Japanese people I have meet have a particularly keen sense of sensing other's feelings. It is again, part of the 'preserving the wa, harmony' because in order to do so, one must be able to sense the general mood within a group.

I'll never forget that day when years ago I felt miserable while teaching class when Mieko approached me afterwards asking me, "are you all right? you seem a bit off today." How did she know?! I was shocked that she saw through my feigned cheerfulness. Wow! How perceptive, how unbelievable...how scary! She maybe knew me better than my own family...though I'll be the first to admit, my family knows me well and they all know that I am pretty bad at masking my feelings, especially when I am feeling down in the dumps. I am trying my best these days to keep a poker face but it is so hard to do! Being expressive is just part of my nature - holding it in sometimes makes me feel like I am going to blow up like a giant atomic bomb.

How is it that Japanese people are so sensitive to other's feelings? Is it just me who thinks this or does anyone else have such an experience? My boyfriend is really quick in perceiving my wavy moods - something which is of great benefit to me, him, and our relationship. I only wish I could be as equally understanding and intuitive about his feelings. Though I must say, he is quite even-keeled so there isn't usually a lot of guesswork involved.

With time I am developing a more sensitive radar for detecting other's moods. It is particularly useful and helps one avoid any unnecessary gaffes. Oftentimes people here are reluctant to speak their mind so it is up to me to read them without any verbal cues. It has been tough but in time, I hope to have mastered it.